This is extensively (and I think fairly) defined in CH. Direct and indirect costs (lost earnings).
See for example Kinderkostentabelle in Eltern in Trennung begleiten | Kanton Zürich
Very interesting! Didn’t know something like that existed! Now I know what to bill my son once he turns 18!
So, 2 young kids, not married. Together for more than 17 years, both working 100% with more or less the same (high) income.
Our rational, or at least mine, about the non-marriage choice :
and I think to probability for her to say no if I propose is probably around 80% ahahahahI just saw some stats, in 2021 in Switzerland, their was 36k marriage… and 17k divorce… not really promising…
I can confirm it (as an « old » trainee lawyer in this field).
By then it might be better to stay unmarried to each receive your AHV/AVS pension if things don’t change 
From a purely financial perspective:
If you both work, don’t get married. You’ll generally pay more taxes than if you are both single.
Exception to the above rule: If you are unhealthy or have high-risk work or hobbies, get married. The insurance/pension benefits for the surviving spouse if one of you passes on may well be worth the tax penalty.
If just one of your works (and it will stay that way), get married. Your spouse will count as a dependent, which will generally result in lower taxes. Consider devorcing before retirement.
As for the emotional side of it, here’s my 2 cents as someone who’s round-tripped on marriage: If you are both the kind of people who will actually keep those vows (for richer or poorer, sickness and health, better or worse, till death do us part) no matter what happens, my hat’s off to you. That level of integrity makes you my absolute idols. Otherwise don’t go telling lies to people you care about. It won’t end well.
I think this part has enormous disatvantages if not married.
Hi everyone
I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one on this case - so here it goes…
We are expecting our baby girl in the next few weeks.
We are not married, leave together and as far as we can tell, that will always be the case 
I’m the one who has a higher revenue and we were trying to find out any information online on how our taxes for 2023 would be?
I’m 99% sure that it’s not “worth” it to get married (financially speaking).
But can anyone share a resume on how the tax burden will change?
We live in Geneva…
Cheers!
You could simulate it with GeTax software.
Make both declaration as not married and then duplicate your tax file to add your partner salary.
All tax detail will be at the end.
Present us the impact but I believe it will be worth it at 2 children.
It could remove some headache for next year on which salary will declare the childcare costs.
Did you actually run the numbers? You might end up paying less taxes in total if one of you earns substantially more than the other. Or the difference might be small. Then there are implications like inheritance taxes, inheritance problems in general, no widow rent from AHV, 1st and 2nd pillar implications and others when not married.
Here are some similar stories
Now, what if it is financially worth to get married in your situation?
To profit from your new legal status, you have to be married by 31.12. Don’t know how much time it takes legally to organize a minimal wedding. Maybe someone who got married recently can update us. Let’s say 4 months, but public offices will probably be slower in summer. Organizing a middle level wedding can easily take 1 year. So, be fast with your calculations and the decision to offer your heart.
Honestly, takes like a couple of weeks tops. We got married in November, decided to do it in September I think. If you have all the necessary paperwork, you could get a civil ceremony on the 3.5. in Lucerne (just looked that up).
I second what @FunnyDjo said. Simulate it in the tax software, it’s really easy. For us (same situation as you: not married in 2022, first child in 2022, married afterwards) it was worth it in 2022. Taxes are going to be less this year since my wife didn’t earn much in 2021 or 2022. We were talking about setting up some sort of contract in case we split up while we were not married, which could’ve cost a lot too. This was now done by marriage. We could’ve saved some money had we married earlier, because I had to declare fatherhood before which costs 100+ too.
Probably won’t be worth it in 2023 anymore since my salary will increase and my wifes salary will increase a lot (go her!) but I haven’t done the math yet so I don’t know.
I always thought that marriage is a bad decision financially speaking since your salaries get combined. Did you end up paying less taxes after marriage then before?? If yes, how was that possible?
The tariff for married persons is lower than that for single persons.
So when one of the two people doesn’t earn as much or anything at all, it’s actually worth it to get married (at least as long as this remains the case).
Is there a way to get married without having to split AVS, 2nd and 3rd pillars in case of a divorce?
I have a few friends whose marriages went down the drain and they were massacred.
I’m not sure about AVS, but 2nd and 3rd are split unless a prenup says otherwise.
More about that topic in this thread: Marriage types and divorce splits
For this reason, a prenup is the right way to go.
Ideally, one does not rely only on AVS, 2nd and 3rd pillar. It also makes a lot of sense to make sure that both spouses work in equal parts after the wedding (something I continuously advocate in this forum 
).
Plus there are deductions if you are married and further deductions, if both work.
In most cantons, there is no tax penalty on the cantonal tax if you get married.
I don’t think 2nd pillar can be excluded even in a prenup?
I need to do some research.
Does anyone follow the political situation around the “Heiratsstrafe”?
I remember reading that the government has agreed in principle to try and change the system to reduce increased tax burden when getting married for all couples, but I don’t know the timeline.
There is info here (German) but maybe someone has more up to date news
It can be excluded, but whether the court would accept it in case of a divorce, is far from certain (information from the notary).
I also think it’s very fair to split 2nd pillar when kids are involved, so I specifically did not include it in our prenup.